25 February 2008

Another Modest Proposal

Again, I am going to repeat myself a little bit. This is refining an earlier idea.

If you call for US military intervention, we own the land we take in combat when the war is done. Don't want a brand new US territory there, don't ask for our military assistance.

If you call for US humanitarian assistance, be aware you are asking to become a US territory. If you do not wish to become a US territory, then starve, I don't care.

The US will ignore you and your problems. We will not intervene in corrupt elections and do not care what form your government takes or how you treat your citizens. We do care how you treat ours. If you grant US citizens visas to enter your nation, we demand that they be safe. If they are not, we demand the perpetrators so that we may try them according to our custom. If you refuse to hand them over, we will invade and make you a US territory, and then try the perpetrators. If you wish to avoid this, simply refuse to issue visas, any American who then travels to your nation is an illegal alien and on their own.

Should your problems get so large that they affect us directly, such as your citizens taking over a commercial aircraft and flying it into a building here, we will invade you and make you a territory of the United States. If you don't want this to happen, keep your people under better control.

The official language of the United States is English. While we do not require you to speak it, all documents and official proceedings will be conducted in English. We are under no obligation to hire a translator and it is your responsibility to be able to understand the documents or official proceedings.

Territories of the United States get 30 years as a territory to become states. That's more than enough time to get the idea of being an American across. Refusal will be considered insurrection and dealt with accordingly. Luckily, being part of the US is a pretty good deal.

Illegal entry into the United States will be dealt with summarily by any level law enforcement, including the militia. Execution is allowable, but deportation is preferred. Second offenses will result in execution.

To be considered a natural born citizen of the United States your parents must have been legal residents or citizens of the US at the time of your birth. Persons born to illegal aliens will be considered citizens of their parents country, but will not be charged with illegal entry.

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