03 March 2017

The Reason For My Silence

I was arrested!

Felony Domestic Assault On The Elderly or Infirm.

The Boy has violent outbursts and is built like a tank.

On occasion you have to physically intervene to get him in a safe place for a time-out so he can cool off and calm down.

Once confined in the safe place he will scream obscenities for a while and occasionally head-butt things.  And you just kind of have to let him wind down before you can insert yourself into His world again.  Takes between ten minutes and an hour.

Then you check to see what kind of scrapes and bruises he's accumulated, treat as needed and continue your day.

Tuesday I did and while I thought he was sleeping it off, he was going out the window.

He was located about a mile from home by an employee of his school with a gash in his forehead, telling them that I had hit him and caused the injury.  They took him straight to the hospital and he was Baker Acted .

Because of his mental health diagnosis, that triggered a mandatory arrest for me under the Abuse of the Elderly Act.  Hurrah.

While I was in jail, The Lovely Harvey left work to recover The Boy.  His story had already changed.

He's been running off a lot now.  We've been slowly, as finances allow, making the house and perimeter more secure to his flights.  Fixing the fence was part of that.  Adding alarms to the doors was part of that.  But securing his window wasn't...

Sunday he'd run off twice.  Once out the front door while we slept and again from Harvey while they were at Home Depot buying the door alarm kit.

This is on top of four other flights in the previous 30 days.

Monday I grounded him, the first real punishment he'd ever gotten for this.

Tuesday... well you know that one.

Wednesday I spent mostly waiting in County to see the judge and get my bond paid.  Willard and Marvyn went far beyond my assessed value to get my bond paid and waited around for my release.  Court a 1300.  See judge at 1330 and set bond.  They find out where to take the money and wait until 1610 for the system to finally acknowledge that bond had been set.  1615 Bond paid.  2055 I am released.  No contact allowed with The Boy, don't get within some distance of his (MY!) house, don't use third parties to make contact...

This next part is relayed from friends whom I can contact and have talked to Harvey.  By the way, the county thinks her cell phone is his contact information so I can't even call my wife!

Harvey didn't attend my court date because DCF was at the house interviewing The Boy about what happened.  His story now matches mine and he even did a walk through with them going step by step from the "take-down" to being confined, to splitting his head open, to taking a nap to taking out the window.

The pattern of his injuries aren't consistent with being beaten, but are with self-abuse.  He's a documented habitual self abuser.  He's also a documented story shifter.

He overwhelmingly doesn't want to be in trouble for things that he knows he should not have done, so he says what he thinks will garner the smallest response.  If you ask, "did your dad do this?" in his mind I had.  I'd interrupted his tantrum and put him in time-out, so I'm responsible for why he bashed his thick skull against the wall.  He can't quite articulate it, but he's sort of saying, "look what you made me do!"

DCF thinks the charges should be dropped.  The Boy's psychiatrist thinks the charges should be dropped.

There's a meeting of some kind, which I still don't know if I am supposed to attend, in two weeks.

Holding pattern until then.

Since I am apparently too rich to be appointed a public defender, I will have to hire my own lawyer for this.  I am without liquid assets being separated from hearth and home.  Now would be a great time to stab that donate button!


  1. So sorry to hear its degraded to that point...

  2. Criminey! Is there anything at all I can do to help?

    1. Know any good Florida lawyers who specialize in this kind of crap?


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