Inverse Relationship

I find that my ability to express myself is in inverse proportion to how much I care about the subject at hand.

I can write eloquently and at length on topics I could care less about.  This is handy for getting a passing grade in college.

I have a great deal of trouble writing or speaking about things that matter to me because these topics are so clear to me that I have lost the path I took to the clarity.  I can not build the tools that will build the tools to make the lens that I see through.

I've lost the process and that makes it very difficult to guide someone else to the clearing to see the stars.

I am standing in that clearing, looking at the glory of the universe with my telescope and talking to you on the cell phone saying, "I'm in the clearing, in the forest, just off that road past that place where there's this sign.  Why do you keep telling me you can't find it?  IT.  IS.  RIGHT.  HERE!"

I'm going to be making an honest attempt to retrace my steps and show you how I got here.

It's not going to be pretty or easy, but I think it will help.  Both of us.