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It's been non-stop around here.
Harvey has had at least three screaming break-downs in the past week or so.
She's fucking stressed by all the appointments, her mom having surgery on her eyes, the broken toe, a poor TV buying decision (since returned) and The Boy being a fucking prick about everything.
And she's worried about me and having no doctor's release for my ribs and treating me like glass; but needing me to resume my duties. Especially with The Boy.
Then we have the way we want to be when we're hurting conflict.
I wanna curl up in a cave and be left alone.
She wants someone to actively check in and give some pampering.
My being all considerate and leaving her in her cave wasn't what she was wanting and it made her feel rather unloved.
I had to remind her that I am not very good at these social cues (I'm only good by comparison to most of my friends) and she need only say something.
I think we're on a more even keel today.
I sympathize with your situation. Couples have different ways of dealing with stress. Life dramas come at you sideways, and from top and bottom. You can try and prepare but there is always some new crisis to overcome you didn't expect. Remember the Gulf oil spill (Deepwater Horizon). Not many saw that coming.
ReplyDeleteYou would be surprised how much a shoulder rub and neck rub helps when those times occur. Just a sign that acknowledges you know she is under pressure and you are trying to help. No words needed.
jrg