A decent amount of my time as a draughtsman was in water treatment.
Waste water treatment.
If you don't have TP and cannot wipe, or must wipe with something else...
Don't flush it.
You're most likely to clog your own sewer line and incur the expense of a plumber to fix it for you.
If you get lucky and your shredded shirt makes it to the lift-station or sewer plant: you have just fucked your neighborhood and/or community.
If you don't have TP, take a shower.
Yes, it's kinda gross, but it's not as bad as you're imagining and you get cleaned and don't fuck up the infrastructure.
It'd be better if you used a bidet from a water consumption perspective, but you didn't think ahead for TP, so I know you didn't think ahead on a bidet.
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