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There was once a time when I used to go to car shows. At least twice a week and I met with friends and we grabbed a bite to eat.
Then I had a disagreement with one and stopped being friends and I started to avoid car shows so as to not bump into them.
I am finding myself in a similar situation with a couple of the local breweries.
I've had the conflict with a friend on Facebook, I don't want to discuss it further and that leads to me to avoid places where I think I might encounter them.
Have you considered continuing to enjoy your hangouts, and letting them avoid you? Just ignore them if they show up. They'll get the message. Why allow them to limit your enjoyment of life?
ReplyDeleteBecause of mutual friends who are not involved in the conflict who are put into the "chose me or them" decision about whom to hang out with.
DeleteI'm actually being very considerate.
I'm not very considerate. The mutual friends usually aren't. They almost always choose the other. But it is usually better to know where you stand. I don't think I am usually the one that starts the conflict, but I'm probably biased in that. I usually just show up and get the "Iowa nice" kind of greeting and then get ignored. I do my own thing. If they don't like it, they can go F themselves. Eventually if they have a problem with it they stop showing up. Like I said, I'm not very considerate.
ReplyDeletewhy i don't have friends...i have people i do things with now and then...used to do the car show in dallas but it got to be such a pain and they also had one every year at the fair...stopped going to the fair because people are assholes...panzer guy...
ReplyDeleteYou are Definitely putting the
ReplyDeleteAw
in Awkward
Bad deal,, that is a
Lose,Lose..
I'd be Thrilled to be the guy who found a decent solution.
I really like the first reply, but, you have other people to consider and I agree, you Are being considerate. What is it costing You to Be considerate and why can't Others deal with a moment that is not comfortable. Why are You the One who loses?
I wish I knew more,,
But I wish a lot of stuff.
It's Your Life. Find a quiet place, maybe a notebook,think about what you are walking away from. How are you going to feel about it in a year?
Is there no honorable way to smooth things over?
Maybe talk to the people who you don't have a problem with, tell them you are going out,and some people you don't want to hang out with..
Seriously,, life is tuff, people are,, people,, Friends come and go, it happens.
How would you deal with it if it was 1850?
Someone gets butthurt,, okay. You have been as nice as you can..
You Seriously gonna let someone else get between you and doing what you want?
You Matter more than any of those so called friends.
Well, unless you are factually incorrect and the reason for the discord.
It's not necessary for everyone else to walk away happy for you to live without guilt.