I've been reading about several suicides on a couple of forums I haunt.
The holidays are a ripe time for suicide.
The threads are full of advice about how to keep your loved one from doing the deed.
Which is great, but...
If someone is dead set on checking out, your first clue will be the call from the cops telling you about the corpse.
The people who succeed at this don't broadcast the decision and don't give hints.
They just do it.
They are not crying for help, they are done.
Perhaps an intervention would have helped, but you would have had to have figured it out from almost no clues before they made the decision.
With that in mind, don't feel guilty that you didn't stop them.
They proceeded in a manner that kept you from figuring out what was about to happen precisely to keep you from stopping them.
As you inferred, people who are attention seeking are going to give off all sorts of clues.
ReplyDeletePeople who are going to suicide are just going to do it.
Big difference between attention seekers and doers. Like those criminals who say "I ain't gonna go back to the Big House" but when surrounded give up. Attention seekers.
Very astute Angus, the ones asking for help only want the attention, negative if only available. I was a psych nurse, the ones succeeded are the ones who wanted out and never let a soul know.
ReplyDeletethey do give hints when you have time to think about it...normal teen female, seemed well liked, had friends, skipped school a lot...then out of the blue shows up at school one day, (seemingly) happy, smiling...goes home and blows her brains out...her coming to school that day was her way of saying goodbye...looking back you see it...usually the ones that voice it are seeking attention or that's their way of asking for help...those who really want it to end find a way or get someone else to do it for them...
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